Why Is My Friend Ignoring My Texts?

Very few things suck as much as a good friend ignoring your texts. You may not have realized it at first. They may have been busy until you start getting concerned. Which begs the question, why is my friend ignoring my texts?

There are a number of possibilities why your friend is ignoring your texts. For instance, your friend is angry with you, they’re busy with work, they’re trying to distance themselves from you, they’re going through a personal crisis or they’re not in the mood to talk.

Some of the reasons are beyond your control and the only thing you can do is wait it out. On the other hand, some reasons may be influenced by your actions which may necessitate some reconciliatory efforts from your end. 

With that being said, let’s get into the nitty-gritty of this topic on why is my friend ignoring my texts.

Your friend is angry with you

Using the silent treatment as a form of punishment when a friend angers you may not be the healthiest way to resolve an issue. 

If anything, it can be viewed as immature and childish. However, if your friend has tried to make an effort to share their feelings and thoughts with you only for it to fall on deaf ears, being ignored may be justified. 

You may have to look at things from an outside perspective and try to analyze the situation. Ask yourself the following, could I have don’t something to offend my friend?

Perhaps you said something insensitive or did something that was hurtful. I know that it would be far more productive if your friend just spoke up but if he or she isn’t, then this is your only solution.

Once you isolate the thing that triggered this issue, you can go about addressing the issue in your next text or call. 

They’re busy with work

Life gets complicated and demanding at times. Most people fall into the habit or trap, whichever way you wish to view it, of bringing work home.

This means that they’re unable to compartmentalize or organize their time in a way to accommodate their personal life.

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If this is something out of the ordinary, you shouldn’t be too worried. Once the situation at work eases up, your friend will return to a more manageable workload and should get back to you. 

But, if this is something that continues to happen, it could be indicative of your friend’s low interest to maintain a social life. Not only is that unhealthy but it can often lead them down a dark road of loneliness with an unhealthy mindset towards his or her work life.

They’re trying to distance themselves from you

I think this reasoning requires a strong sense of self-awareness and the ability to be self-critical. 

We all have the potential of being a bad influence in someone else’s story. 

If you happen to be that person and your friend is dealing with the situation by ignoring you, the only two options at your disposal are to try and be more respectful to his or her needs or to just allow them to move on. 

You can’t force someone to be your friend, especially if they are actively trying to stay away from you. 

Related post: Why do friends do change?

They’re going through a personal crisis

After going through a loss in the family, I remember feeling extremely disillusioned by life. I still loved my friends and wanted to be around them.

But during that time, all I could do was isolate myself for a while until I could process my personal crisis. 

My sibling goes through a very similar situation. When he is overwhelmed with stress, his social life takes a knock.

It’s never intentional. He just can’t separate himself from the stress and until he can work through it, everything else gets neglected. 

As much as this may not be the best way to deal with personal issues, having good friends who share their support and provide some leeway is abundantly beneficial. 

Once some normalcy enters your friend’s life, he or she will probably knocking at your door again.

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They’re not in the mood to talk

Moodswings suck. People can get into a groove and just stay there for a while. There may be no problem that needs to be fixed or any underlying issues between you two.

Your friend probably needs some space from everyone or is trying to prevent him or herself from spreading negativity to the people in their life. 

Just let them know that if this is the case, you miss them and can’t wait to catch up again soon. 

You never know, this message alone may be enough to make your friend come running back to you with arms wide open.  

You friend is rude

I hate to say it but some friends do not care much for being punctual and unbothered by social etiquette. This friend could actually like you very much and would be happy to speak to you in person but when it comes to texts, they don’t really care.

It’s rude. That’s certainly true, especially when a friend or family member goes out of their way to check up on them

You could call him or her out on their inconsiderate behavior or try to let them know that ignoring your text messages makes you feel bothered.

Related post: Is it rude not to reply to a text?

What To Do If Your Friend Is Ignoring You

what to do if your friend is ignoring your texts

Try to make amends. Perhaps, up until now, you’ve been trying to act normal by texting messages that aren’t dealing with the issue. 

In such an event, addressing the issue and asking your friend about how they feel can open the doors of communication again.

You want to come from a place of compassion and with a desire to fix things. Don’t be confrontational and aggressive either.

The idea of such a text or call is to ascertain their reasoning for ignoring you. If it falls within the category of reasoning that is beyond your control like a personal crisis or being overworked, things can transition back to normal with relative ease.

If your friend is upset with you or being faulty, rather than use your approach as an excuse to argue, your friend will have to respond fairly or risk looking rude, childish and immature. 

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If you must, double text your friend. Sometimes, making an extra effort and extending yourself Abit more can be all the effort needed to make your friend feel like you genuinely care. 

After doing so, you should wait for a reply.

Don’t waste your time chasing after someone who is not willing to open the doors of communication to rectify the issue. 

It takes two to tango and two people to save a friendship. 

What’s the point of begging someone to talk to you if they don’t see value in the friendship anymore?

At which point, walk away without getting into a heated back and forth. If they actually care about you, they’ll eventually reach out. Otherwise, you won’t hear from them again.

I like to think that the friendships which are destined to last a lifetime will always find a way to conquer problems and distance. If this friend is a keeper, eventually, they’ll come back or make an effort to rectify the issue. Otherwise, you may have to accept that this friend is just not worth the effort and allow them to distance themselves.

In the end, that may just create more space in your life for friends who genuinely like you and want to be around you.


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