Making new friends can be a scary experience when you haven’t had much luck lately or in the past. There’s so much to think about and the fear of rejection can be off-putting but more than that, feeling lonely is just as hard and the idea of making a new friend when you’re genuinely interested in having someone around isn’t as scary anymore.
So, what can you do? The best way to make a friend is to find things you are sincerely interested in, like joining a club in the hobby that you enjoy. When you do things you love, it’s easier to attract people who share the same vision and outlook as you do and this makes it easier to befriend someone rather. Friendships that share the common interests and activities usually last longer than those that are just acquaintances.
I’ve put together a list of ways and tips you can use that will help you make new friends.
I won’t lie and say it’s going to be easy or happen instantly but eventually you will find someone who clicks with you. All you need to do is step out of your comfort zone and try your best!
How To Make New Friends
Discover new hobbies
This is probably the best way you can make new friends who will be genuinely interested in hanging out with you because they too will know that you understand them and likewise.
But more than this, when you find new activities that you can do on your own as well, it gives you the opportunity to grow as a person rather than depending on others for your sole happiness.
When you do things that you enjoy, it becomes visible in the way you act, the things you say, and how you are as a person overall.
Joining meet-ups or classes for your hobbies gives you that opportunity to meet up with people who share similar likes.
It becomes a hundred times easier to start up new conversations and get to know each other, especially if you’re bound to see them for more than a few times.
You’ll notice that there are plenty of opportunities to socialize whether you’re at a gym class, painting class, writer’s club, or at any training center.
If you don’t already have any hobbies that allow you to join others or maybe you don’t have any hobby, here’s a list of ideas you can try that may interest you:
List of hobbies/classes you can try out to meet new friends:
- Running
- Cycling
- Hiking
- Painting
- Dancing
- Gym Class
- Writing
- Cooking
- Choir/Music Club
- Reading/Book Club
Volunteer When You Can
Volunteering is a great way to do two things at once, meet new people and help out others too. There’s no pure joy that you can get like helping others in a big or small way. It’s incredibly rewarding to know that you helped someone and it makes you a better person too.
Feeling lonely when you have no friends isn’t as bad anymore when you stop focusing on it but rather dedicated to helping others.
The great thing about volunteering at an animal shelter, soup kitchen, or old age home is that you are going to meet other people who are there to help out too.
This gives you the chance to get to know them better if you tend to volunteer with them regularly.
There are many places you can volunteer in your own community or elsewhere. You can check in your local newspapers or find a match online.
Look for a place that you will be genuinely interested in helping out rather than using it solely just to meet new friends.
Put Yourself Out There
The only way for you to make a new friend is to put yourself out there so that others can see you. We might not know we are doing it but it could take a certain glance or body posture that we do that gives off the impression that we don’t want anyone around.
You’ll also have to think positively when trying to make new friends rather than going into it with assumptions and judgments. Let the past mistakes go and don’t compare the current person to your old friends.
Give yourself the chance to fully know someone even if they may not be as you imagined.
To help you win a new friend, here are a few ways you can use to approach this person:
4 Ways To Approach Someone
- Pay them a sincere compliment
- Greet them with a smile
- Mention a similarity between you two
- Ask them questions or offer your help
Get To Know the Person Genuinely
Rather than gaining friends for the sake of having friends or to show others that you aren’t alone, make sure to really get to the person for who they are.
Show an interest in the things they do or say. Make sure to find out what they like, where they like to go or do, what’s their dreams and goals.
Listen compassionately and give honest advice that won’t be harmful or hurt their feelings.
See also: 10 Signs Of A True Friend
Keep In Contact
If you truly want to be friends with this person and like them, make it known. Exchange phone numbers or make plans to visit new places together or to just hang out.
Ask that person if they would like to go see a movie or eat out together whenever they have time.
Message them time to time to ask things that are related to the group you’re in or to just say ‘hi, how you’ve been?’ once in a while.
However, don’t be disappointed if this person isn’t enthusiastic about texting. Some people just prefer to socialize in person rather than spending most of their time messaging.
Accept Invitations
If your new friends or people who you have met invite you out to go check out some new event or grab a bite, grab that chance to make friends with them.
A simple meal and discussion apart from the formal environment may be a good chance to bond and get to know one another better.
Also, try inviting these friends out when you can and see if they also would like to hang out again.
This is a great way of knowing whether they like you or not and want to be friends with you. Don’t feel disheartened if the person says their busy or can’t make it.
That’s quite normal.
Simply ask them out again and if they reject you a few more times, then you know this person isn’t the right friend for you. Try again with someone else but never ever give up if you’re determined to find a good friend.
Be Open-Minded
It’s easy to allow yourself to feel bad when you aren’t getting anywhere near finding a new friend. Don’t let this get you down. You will find someone who’ll want to spend time with you and that’s why you have to keep positive.
Also, learn to be more open towards the people who want to be friends with you. Don’t turn them away because you feel like you guys won’t work out.
Accept that this person is who they are and so are you, even if you guys don’t have that many things in common, you could always find new things that you can share the same interest in.
Give a new friendship a chance to blossom before you think it won’t work and give up altogether.
It takes time to find someone you can really be friends with and you need to give it time to see if anything comes from it.
Show Your True and Honest Self
Never try to be someone you’re not. Don’t try to create a false impression of yourself because you think it will make you look favorable to the other person because often this image will shatter.
Be true to yourself and show your best qualities so that those who find you relatable will want to be friends with you.
Most people don’t want to be tricked and it often shows when you’re acting fake.
There’s no need to impress someone to get them to be your friend. If they really do want to be friends with you, they’ll also make the effort.
Friendship goes two ways, it should never be the effort of one person only. Or else, there’ll be no balance and the person who does more may feel used.
You’ll attract a friend more naturally if you just show the best of you.
In Conclusion
Finding someone to be friends with needs time but it’s not so hard when you’re doing things you love.
Friends that you share similar interests will be easier to get to know each other and form a bond which is one of the best ways to make a friend.
If you want a genuine friendship with someone, you’re going to need to be honest, kind, supportive, and interested in this person but you also have to be aware that the other person has to show you the same respect.
Don’t force a friendship either because it will only make you unhappy.
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